alt text: I rest my head on the backside of a kitten, who is resting his backside on my shoulder.

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"We need to lean on each other when times are tough!"

"Wait, what? How do you lean on each other -- if you're both leaning won't you fall?"

In Soviet Kitten, sense makes you!

me: *exists*
society: you're not dudely enough
me: *tries to be dude*
society: that's not very dudely, dude harder
me: *dudes my brains out*
society: dude, you dude like a girl
me: fuck you then I'mma girl now
society: shockedpika.jpg

!Twitter cross-post! 

RT @MistressMatisse
When you ARE a sexworker: “omg you can’t do this job! You must quit immediately and do something else! Think of THE CHILDREN”

When you try to, in fact, do something else: “omg you can’t do this job! You must be stopped immediately - you’ve done SEXWORK! Think of THE CHILDREN” twitter.com/jakesucky/status/1

Needless to say, once she dropped the "Esq." (Esquire) into a letter, even the cockiest SOB company lawyers tended to change their tune substantially

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One thing I miss about Mom was her ability to write Carefully Worded Letters to people when she was annoyed with them

and sometimes, after a series of Carefully Worded Letters drew responses to the effect that she did not know what she was talking about regarding the law, she would start citing specific precedents and supreme court cases and such

if you *still* insisted she was clueless, *then* you got a carefully worded letter signed (her name), Esq.

I really hope whatever alien species makes First Contact with Earth does some research before showing up with their invasion force

it would be most unpleasant for the Borg if they showed up here today, e.g., and were not prepared for the legions of horny catgirls going "assimilate me harder daddy uwu >_<"

i want to be a mysterious stranger in town who fixes everyone's problems and then leaves

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!Twitter cross-post! 

RT @jckarter
Tired: aliens coming to Earth and speaking English
Wired: aliens coming to Earth and speaking Mandarin, because there are more Mandarin speakers
Inspired: aliens coming to Earth and speaking ARM machine code, because there are more ARM cores than humans

I really hope whatever alien species makes First Contact with Earth does some research before showing up with their invasion force

it would be most unpleasant for the Borg if they showed up here today, e.g., and were not prepared for the legions of horny catgirls going "assimilate me harder daddy uwu >_<"

What you did in the dark was damn near pull a muscle trying not to trip on him

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cw earworm:

My cat kno-ows what you did in the da-a-a-a-ark!
So little merp merp merps
Little merp merp merps
Little merp merp merps
He so fluffy!

Alt: just-microwaved hot dogs still in the microwave. A bag of hot dog buns is on the microwave. The microwave clock reads 4:20

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cw food:

I don't smoke weed but I munch in solidarity with those who do

The Four Warriors of Light were saving the world from Chaos long before Sonic the Hedgehog made it cool send tweet

The One Ring is powerful? What kind of power? "Power" is all well and good, but if it doesn't include the power to get the black seven I need to move this red six, then I'm not interested.

Also the "refer a friend" button let me send a text message to myself, tap the resulting link myself, and claim the in-game reward

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Of course, my social media app defaulted to only posting here, and that was my only post on the subject... and it still gave me the in-game reward LOL???

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unstable.systems Mastodon (Glitch Edition)

This is unstable.systems, a general-purpose invite-only Mastodon instance. We'll always be pretty small, and we hope to be a comfortable instance to be on.